i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Randomize