Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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