from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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