But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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