My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
