he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
