Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
she pinky promised me she was 18
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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