physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Randomize
