Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
