youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
