dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
