If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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