Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
