Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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