he thought i was a dude.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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