what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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