i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
operation harelip BJ is a go
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize
