i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
