Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
