I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize