garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
