My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
she told me i tasted like america
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
