Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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