Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize
