How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
