I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize
