just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
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And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
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I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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