You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
