I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize