So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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