can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Randomize
