My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
