her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
