i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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