I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
