Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I just want nice things and good sex
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
