PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
