My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I've blown a few things in my day
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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