I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
im holly from the hills drunk
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
