I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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