She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
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