I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
