some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
My vagina just clenched in fear
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