i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
