butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
i just wanna soil my oats bro
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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