so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
