Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize