You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
