butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
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the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
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We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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