I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
